Thursday, February 12, 2009
Friday, January 23, 2009
Tru Sista?

Am I less of a sister because I'm light?
You think because I blend in a little better
everything for me is alright?
I might not look like you
not dark enough to be black
or hood enough as a matter of fact
but "they" know I'm not one of them
So where do I stand?
You might be hated by the white man
but I'm hated by you
My sista
the one who shares my pain
I thought the field and house negro
was all in the past
After just celebrating MLK day
we are still far from free at last
Just remember, I am no less of a sista
just because I am bright
I am fighting the same struggle,
fighting the same fight
the only difference is
my skin happens to be light
But, I am STILL a SISTA!
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
The Pain of Love

Have you ever been heart broken because of your love for someone or their love for you? I have experienced them both, and still do. My hubby and I had a long distance dating relationship and part of our marriage. We met while living in different states, and his former career took him out of town while we were married. I had never cried so much in my life. Missing him hurt to the core. I honestly felt pain in my chest. It was a physical hurt and emotional. Thank God that type of pain is over. We are together and happy.
Now on to the other type of pain. I am currently feeling heart broken because of how much I am loved. Sounds crazy huh? I know. I, at one point had guys to feel feelings for me that I was unable to reciprocate. I felt bad but that's not the pain I'm referring to.
My mother has a love for me that is soooo deep and sooo strong I pray that I can only be that loving to my kids, if I don't ship them off first. She drops what she's doing at the drop of a dime to be there for me and my kids. Not to my request of course. It hurts because I know how badly she needs a break. I know how she looks forward to things but she will still drop it all.
People think it's because of the MS. Yes, she has been there. Coming over late at night and early in the morning to help with the house or kids. But she has always been that way. Maybe because I'm the baby.
It's hurting now more than ever because I am near 30 and she still acts as if I am her responsibility. Its time for her to rest. But she wont. She stays on the move. My hubby says God will bless her and so will we. I owe her, feels like forever. Anyone have a love like this? Ever felt a love like this?
Friday, January 9, 2009
Born Gay?

Thursday, January 1, 2009
2009 started off a GREAT year!

I am so nervous. I can't believe I am finally going to do this. This has been my dream for the last 3 years. The line is getting shorter, and I'm up next. I adjust the mic while looking into the crowd of people. I begin.
"First giving honor to God and pastor. You know the Lord works in mysterious ways. I was just telling my husband that I am coming here expecting something. But never in a million years would I have thought that I would be here, standing in front of all of you. For 3 years I tried to get my story out. I needed to get it out. I needed to spread the word. I wrote emails, blogs and was even told I should write a book. But none of it gave me the satisfaction of being here right now. 3 years ago on my brother's birthday March 6, 2006 I was diagnosed with MS. My fingers and toes were mute. I had no feeling. Some days I couldn't get out of bed. I couldn't make my baby's bottle. But I knew God didn't give me these 3 beautiful babies to not be able to see them or raise them. I was told that I had to take medication or I will be in a wheelchair. For 3 months I injected myself daily with my therapy medication. My spirit wouldn't let me continue it. I had dreams and I had to stop. My faith wasn't strong enough to claim my healing but I said, "the next MRI will not show that lesion" and this time last year it was gone. But you know doctors always downplay God. They told me that that's what lesions do, they come and go. But I knew better. I have been going to this church for 2 yrs and this is the first time I was able to see the pastors face clearly. For the first time I didn't get dropped off at the door, I walked across the parking lot. Pray my strength in the Lord."
The congregation stood to their feet, giving God a much deserved hand and mouth praise. I did it. I accomplished my dream of telling how God worked in my life to 100's. That night was better than any party or club the New Years' has brought before. My eyes were red, throat scratch and head pounding. I had been changed. I left that place 4 hours later meeting a few people that my story touched. I left 4 hours later not the same as I had came. God moved in that place and now the real work begins!
I hope 2009 brings you all peace, happiness, love and prosperity! I love each and every one of you!
Be Blessed,
Tia
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
FLOWERS FADE

Humble Prayer
help me to love others,
the way that you love me.
Help me Lord, in all that I do,
to always be a reflection of you.
Walk with me closely, night and day,
so I shall never go astray.
Live in my heart, and give me your light,
that someday I may become pleasing in your sight.
Make me your vessel, that others may see,
your spiritual presence dwelling within me.
Walk with me Father, till my journey is through,
then by your grace, bring me home to you.
My Chat with REPO!!!

Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Someone else Likes Me!

Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Watch the company you keep.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Still
Do you have a love like this? If not, I hope life brings you to it. Tamia is my favorite vocalist. Not only does she share my battle with MS..she seems to have a sweet spirit.
What if.........?
What if you were happy and in love. For the first time you have contemplated kids and marriage! For the first time your lover is actually your best friend!
Tragedy strikes when you find out that your man is sick and in need of a kidney transplant and only have months to live. Dialysis is not working and he is still taking a turn for the worse. The only option is a transplant. All hope seems to be gone when you find out that the donor list is a yr long until you decided to get tested.
The doctor comes in to your man's hospital room and tells you that he has the results of the test. You and your guy are anticipating the results. The doctor sits beside your fiance' and says that you are a match. You drop to the floor in tears. Finally, you all can be a happy family!
The doctor doesn't seem to be sharing in your joy. He looks up at you and tells you you are 6weeks pregnant and you can not be a donor.
What do you do? You are ready to save the life of your future husband but he wants you to keep the baby.
Ladies would you term your pregnancy for your one true love? Fellas would you want your life to be spared or the life of your child's?
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Thursday, October 23, 2008
They like me, They really like me!!
I don't know anyone with MS other than Blinders Off to give the "Attitude with Gratitude" award. So I will hand it to those who not only have great blog reads, but are very inspirational! My award goes to:
Let Me Explain- She has been my BFF and inspiration from the womb. There's no one like her!
Don- He reintroduced the love of writing to me..he is a great poet as well.
Potent Praise- A group of God fearing people who love Jesus and are my friends! Thanks for adding me as an author!
Natarsha- Teaching children in Korea while still running her Photography Co.
Christoph J- Teaching children in Korea and still using his inspirational poetry to touch all.
Tamara Angela Grant - Inspiring all to read and write. And helping those who want to be authors!
Raw Dawg - Philosophical posts that keep my brain workin!
MyBrownBaby- Great author who's writings are inspiring to me.
1. - Her writing is witty and edgy!
Free Spirit Butterfly - her trails and testimonies are inspirational to many.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Pick your Battles

Over the last year I have had 7 close family and friends embark upon marriage. 2 of which will jump the broom this Nov! So I dedicate this to all of you!!
The bible speaks of having a quiet spirit. Maybe I'm wrong, but to me that goes hand in hand with picking your battles.
Not everything has to be addressed or confronted. We have to learn what to speak on and what to let go.
This is good advice for relationships with children and adults. I had a friend that told me she was tired of fighting with her then 6 yr old daughter about getting up and ready for their Saturday errands, so she let her daughter dress herself. She was wrinkled and not matching at times but it worked and they made it out of the house in a timely fashion. Also, it stopped a lot of the whining and bickering. Now that idea might not work for every parent but it made Saturdays a lot easier for my friend. She picked her battles.
I have learned that even as a married adult, I have to pick battles with my husband. I know his pet peeves and I try to not aggravate them. But at the same time he must realize I will be me, and there will always be something I might do/do not do that he doesn't like so accept certain things. Remember we are consider "help mates" to each other in the bible. Rest assured, fighting every battle is not a help to either partner.
So how do I know what battle to fight?
First lets not consider everything a battle. Look at it as simply expression of feelings or just information. Looking at in as a battle all the time can result in a war!!
Ask yourself: Is this issue worth addressing (could mental, physical or financial harm result if not addressed?) Is it merely a pet peeve? Who would benefit from this battle if addressed?
Moral of the story speak on the necessary and let foolishness go. Not only will it help ease the possibility of war, it will help us learn what's really important and what's not.
Anything you would like to add on this topic or any others? Visit www.tias-mind.blogspot.com
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
State of Confusion

Do Over
I'm sure we all know that even the worst parts of our lives are important in the molding of who we are. But there are still those moments where we are like "dag, I wish...."
Is there a lover that you feel you might have been better off if you'd never met them? Or a job that caused more stress than money made? A family member that you wish didn't share your blood line?
We all have those little regrets. A one night stand that you wouldn't dare share with even your closest friend?
Just for fun, what is your lil regret?
My biggest regret is not going away to school and majoring in my true love, Child Psychology.
What would you like to do over?
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
How to Keep a Black Woman...(in my opinion)
Love Yourself- One for sure way to love us is to love you! Be confident, flaunt what you are good at..work on what you are not.
Tell her- Yes you must show it, but it is also important to say it. Look into our eyes when you do.
appearance- You all aren't the only ones who care about it. Keep yourself up. Get your hair cut, buy some new kicks. Take pride in your swagger!
No show offs- don't put everything on display. We don't need to hear how loud your stereo can get or how many chains you can get from your local flee Market.
Educated- Its nothing like talking with a well spoken educated man. It's attractive if you know about today's events and a lil history. 2pac and Biggie don't count in either of the choices.
Take care of home- in every way you could imagine. Bills, and the overall happiness of your woman and your home.
Head of the house- this is a big one to me..being the head doesn't mean you dictate and bark orders...head of the house also means giving a role/duty to someone who might do it better than you. Just cause you are a man doesn't mean you can do it all. If you suck at house hold repairs, it's ok..HIRE SOMEONE!
honesty- be truthful about your feelings. Don't tell us what you think we want to hear. (unless we ask, "does this dress make me look fat") let us know how you feel. It takes a real man to express how he feels. It's ok to use words like hurt, sad and "I'm sorry"! You will be a happier man if you do.
There are sooooooooooo many more but here are a few. At the end of the day treat her as your best friend. If you are married to her, she comes before your friends and right after Jesus!
Feel free to leave word on how you would love a black woman or how you want to be loved.
Friday, October 10, 2008
If You Were Never Born
How different would your friends be if they didn't have you? Who would be parenting your kids? Everything around you is how it is because of the people. That mean teacher is being a little more fair because of you. That racist boss will keep his comments to himself in the privacy of his own thoughts because of you. Your mother is more trusting of teens because of you. But realize you also could be a hell raiser and it could be the other way around.
That woman wouldn't have that black eye if it weren't for you. That child would still be alive if you would've said "no" to that beer at the club. Not all people are positive but we all play a part in this world. What side do you play.
Would people wish you were never born?
Sunday, October 5, 2008
What is Your Most Embarrassing Moment?
My city, the city I love more than any other..Chicago! Yes, my city had me trying to escape..lol.
Remember that cousin I spoke of? Well, we decided to take our singing to the next level.
We started taking vocal lessons, well I took 3. 70.00 per week, I couldn't afford at that time. So I started practicing what I was taught from my vocal coach and my high school friend Tamyra Gray.
Anyhoo, my cousin and I sang everywhere! Did nigh clubs (another embarrassing story), radio jingles and even was approached by managers and other groups that were interested in us!
We were on our way!!
So I thought.
We got the opportunity to sing live on a cable access channel. Yeah you know em, every city has that crazy cable channel that is low budget and usually are some kind of dance or talent show.
We were one of the groups who were to be featured on this show.
My other cousin was our manager (since she had the degree in Advertising/Marketing). We had one family member as our stylist for our hair and wardrobe..we were doing big thangs!
Tease was our name...not in a sexual manner but because we were Tia and Tanesha and to spell it T's was lame.
We practice our song by Faith Evans for weeks and had it down packed.
We arrive at the studio and we are greeted by a man like Jerome from Martin.
Yes, he was looking at us like we were a juicy steak!
He showed us around the studio and told us where we would be singing.
We asked him if we could use the restroom so we could practice and freshen up. He showed us the restroom and told us we were next.
"We're first?" "You're the only." "what?!?" "No one else showed up, so you girls have the entire 1 hr show."
Total fear and panic at this point. An hour show! Are you kidding. We shoulda known this would happen, after all this man was also the 1 of the 2 camera men, the sound guy and probably the janitor too for all we knew.
We are ready to sing. We look for the "3..2..1.." countdown. And we are on! Only thing is the sound guy screwed up our tape and it started in the middle of our intro!!! As we stand there looking aimlessly into the camera, I desperately try to play catch up.
That song wasn't the worst, well it wasn't for me. My cousin has a different opinion. My screw up came on a later song.
Now we are told we would have an interview. Oh lord. We sit with the man who is the sound man, camera man and now the host/interviewer. It didn't go well. Every time I spoke I got a lecture like a child and everything my cousin said she could never elaborate when more was asked. This interview was such a bust we were determined to take the spotlight off of us by telling him our manger/cousin also had a great voice. He licks his lips (she was also a juicy steak) and calls her on to the stage. Of course she gestured she was going to beat us up after the show. She never came on the set. Mind you the audience was filled with 13 people...9 of whom were with us!
Time for our second song. "His Eye is on the Sparrow", which we hadn't sung in months! A song I was just learning months earlier. The song was going fine until I thought it was over and put the mic down, only to hear my cousin ad-libbing more to the song. So I play it off the best way possible..pick up the mic and keep going. Now we are finally done. So I thought, she is still singing the song that should have been over by now. So here I am looking silly again by putting my mic down as if we are done.
Once it was finally over..the audience was to come and shake our hand while the credits rolled. Our family was not prepared to be on tv..as my other cousin slides and scoots sheepishly past one camera..another one was getting her every move! So we were all embarrassed that day.
Months later co-workers noticed me from that show. The show that we hoped no one would see being that it was aired on a hot summer July evening at 7pm. Why was anyone home anyway??
My cousin has successfully lost the tape and it will never be shown again!! Lord knows I hope!
I just revealed my embarrassing moment, and my cousin's...what's yours?
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Where Has Life Taken You?
Since 3yrs old, like a lot of kids, I wanted to be an entertainer. My cousin and I sang, put on plays(wrote our own songs and plays) and danced wherever there was a group of 3 or more. We did shows for family functions, bday parties and all. But at the same time, I was the "lil old lady". Giving advice and always in grown folk business. Analyzing and singing is what I always did. I continued that love into junior high. I danced with a dance group in Cali and was on the schools Peer Mediation board. Still entertaining and analyzing. Once I got to high school I joined the chorus. Still singing. Even took some college courses on Music Mngmnt.
but having my son young and getting married young changed everything. I realized singing was a hobby and going to school for psychology wasn't in the plans at that moment. So I took some coding classes and continued on with life. I continued my love for writing since that was the only thing left of my childhood dream I had.
Now I look back and realize all my time is rapidly leaving. I could have completed two dreams by now. My cousin kept dancing in Cali and made it to some really good videos backing some hiphop and rap groups. My Chicago cuz/BFF kept singing for a while and has also put on Chicago land talent shows with her own production co.. See a pattern here?
Me? Still finding my way. lol...Feeling too old for some things, too young for others. I still plan on making my way to my Masters in Child Psychology and minor in journalism or at least a writing class. Pray for me! ...lol
Are you doing what you've always dreamed?
Are you saving the Environment?
Now I'm a mom of 3. I can not hop on my exercise bike when I need to blend my 8 months old food. Nor can I wash all of my load of laundry early in the day, one after the other. My baby sleeps during that time so it's more feasible for me to wash at midnight. I also can not afford to buy water to flush down the toilet.
One thing I can say that is achievable for me and my lifestyle is eco friendly Canon Digital Cameras. I am sooo not with technology but I am a mother who is always taking pics. After my hubby's constant advise to get with the "times", I looked up eco friendly technology and found the SuperWarehouse and that Canon has minimized product packaging and the industry's longest-running toner recycling program! I never thought of toner recycling as energy saving. I have always done it for money saving! I even found HP Laptops that are light weight and thin for as little as 400.00! My laptop is not light weight to me, unfortunately, but who would've thought lightweight and thin helps the environment. I also found a few other laptops that won medals for environmental eco friendliness. Even though I have a pretty good scanner, epson scanners are also good on energy if anyone's interested.
Ok let's be mindful that environmental friendly products are also friendly on the pockets. With the gas shortage frenzy here in Ga, saving money is a huge deal! I am a faith believer and I know that we won’t be here forever, but since we are here now, let’s do our part and make our gadgets and trinkets eco friendly. Especially if it’s things you are already using. So if anyone is interested in saving the planet or your pockets check out superwarehouse. Everything on it is eco friendly!
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Living outside your means?
Why do you have a 70-90k automobile but live at home or in an apartment? Why is your credit bad and you can't get cable in your name but you have on more bling than Marc Jacobs has in stock?
I saw a show on lives of Millionaires and they all shopped on clearance racks, drove modest cars and used coupons. You can't stay rich when you spend lavishly.
Why do we put our money into materialistic things when our kids don't even have college funds?
Are you an spending outside your means? Know anyone who is? Put em on blast! lol
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Carousel Checks
I know we are in a paperless society. Everything is being converted to computers and plastic, at least that's what I thought. Not even a year ago something I was applying for asked for a voided check! Are you serious? lol. I was really taken back because I was told in order to be approved I needed one old check. Even the ones I had were from another very old account. It had been years since I had used a check. Ever since that happened I started considering getting checks again for "just in case" basis. I have checks now with my bank but I've never seen the variety that Carousel Checks have or maybe I‘m just out of the loop.
I've always liked photo checks but people are too crazy nowadays to have your face plastered across the front of your checks along with your personal info. But I have really been considering putting my hubby's business logo on it for his business checks instead of using personal checks.
I wrote my first check at 22 or 23. I was never a check person or credit card person. I always used cash until I realized how important credit was. I just started to build credit at 26 and I'm glad I waited because I would've had terrible credit if I had done it sooner.
Even when paying my car note they want the check number. So since society is obviously still using them, I might as well too. Only this time get the ones I like and not the old plain ones hubby gets. I seen some for sports lovers and even religious beliefs.
If you guys could check out the site and tell me if you would get them. I personally think it's a good deal and they are cute but again I'm no check writer so I don't want to waste my money. If you do order checks let me know how you like them cause I think I will. I would love your input and feed back on this.
Question:
Does anyone still use checks?
Would you be leery if a company took check only?
How much do you pay or what is reasonable?
Would you consider Carousel Checks?
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
LaShawntanique Alize' Jekins
Don't get me wrong, I named my kids Tyler, Justin and Morgan because I love the simplicity of the name...as well as the name period. I have nothing against a Snatinique or Shanique but does society embrace it? Do we care about what society thinks. I do to a point. I have to live in this society, survive in this society so I do need societies approval if I want a hassel free life. Now mind you, some things I can careless about what society says because my Father owns the society so I'm good!
Still, I dont want to fill anyones quota when I apply for a job or enroll in school.
I want my name to be over looked. I want my skills, accomplishments and training to speak for me.
Monday, September 22, 2008
Who are You
Who are you?
You are not what you perceive to be
Nice and gentle
that may be
but that doesn't mean anything
Who are you inside?
What will your eulogy read?
Who are you?
Not the one you use to be
Sometimes I'm not sure if you even know
Look in the mirror
Who do you see?
I don't know....
the reflection is me.......
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Office SuperMarket in the UK!
Maybe I'm a retard but I didn't know they were soooo much like us. They don't have all of this weird high fashion that the reality shows say. I know with me moving soon I would love to have their products.
I got the scoop on Korea from my friend Natarsha, but I want someone to check out the UK for the retail, and when you go, please pick me up this computer desk. lol. I wonder do they deliver? lol. They say 48 hours but does that apply to Lithonia Ga.?
In case you didn't know, my hubby has his own business and I would really like to get some home office furniture but because I'm not working, (due to excessive blogging just kidding) I can't afford new office furniture at the moment.
I know ya'll think I'm wacky for ranting and raving about a store in the UK, but when you have been looking for something specific (like that boardroom table) and finally find it for the price you are willing to pay to only find out it's in the UK, that hurts. lol. My other pieces match that boardroom table to a tee! Oh well, maybe oneday I'll be able to fly there in a day like so many others do. Well none of my friends (wink). I'll just dream about flying over to the city of love and shopping. Until then, I will just sign up for their newsletter and browse the site until I make it to the fab cities in the UK, unfortunately that is the closest I will get to it.
Let me stop before you guys think I'm crazy but seriously, check it out. In person if you're blessed like that, or online and become a dreamer like me...lol
Till later, or until I find a job.
smooches..
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
"Mind Your Business Couch"
One time a guy in the car in front of me was waving at me thru his rear view. Do you know my 9yr old (then 5) said, "mommy why was that man waving at you?" Are you kidding me. I was blown away.
The straw that broke the camels back was when I was trying to have a very discreet convo with my mother and that 9yr old yells from another room, "what?". I look around confused. He says, "mommy who's going there?". I had had enough. I told him to sit on the new "mind your business couch" until he learns to mind his own. It works great!
Taking away play stations and threatening whoopings don't work. But it's something about sitting all alone for no specified time that kids hate! Now all of my nosey kid visitors know the "mind your business couch". Niece and nephew. They actually catch their tongues now. Just be sure to not forget that they are on there like I did my 9yr old for an hour. He missed play time and had to go straight to bed..hahaha
If your child has nose issues, sit them on the "mind your business couch".
I threatened to put my hubby on it for 20 mins but that didn't work.