Friday, January 23, 2009

Tru Sista?

Am I less of a sister because I'm light?

You think because I blend in a little better

everything for me is alright?

I might not look like you

not dark enough to be black

or hood enough as a matter of fact

but "they" know I'm not one of them

So where do I stand?

You might be hated by the white man

but I'm hated by you

My sista

the one who shares my pain

I thought the field and house negro

was all in the past

After just celebrating MLK day

we are still far from free at last

Just remember, I am no less of a sista

just because I am bright

I am fighting the same struggle,

fighting the same fight

the only difference is

my skin happens to be light

But, I am STILL a SISTA!

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Single Ladies!!

She got Bey faded!! Thanks Princess Katrina for the cutest video!

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

The Pain of Love

Have you ever been heart broken because of your love for someone or their love for you? I have experienced them both, and still do. My hubby and I had a long distance dating relationship and part of our marriage. We met while living in different states, and his former career took him out of town while we were married. I had never cried so much in my life. Missing him hurt to the core. I honestly felt pain in my chest. It was a physical hurt and emotional. Thank God that type of pain is over. We are together and happy.
Now on to the other type of pain. I am currently feeling heart broken because of how much I am loved. Sounds crazy huh? I know. I, at one point had guys to feel feelings for me that I was unable to reciprocate. I felt bad but that's not the pain I'm referring to.
My mother has a love for me that is soooo deep and sooo strong I pray that I can only be that loving to my kids, if I don't ship them off first. She drops what she's doing at the drop of a dime to be there for me and my kids. Not to my request of course. It hurts because I know how badly she needs a break. I know how she looks forward to things but she will still drop it all.
People think it's because of the MS. Yes, she has been there. Coming over late at night and early in the morning to help with the house or kids. But she has always been that way. Maybe because I'm the baby.
It's hurting now more than ever because I am near 30 and she still acts as if I am her responsibility. Its time for her to rest. But she wont. She stays on the move. My hubby says God will bless her and so will we. I owe her, feels like forever. Anyone have a love like this? Ever felt a love like this?

Friday, January 9, 2009

Born Gay?

I have heard many people say they were born gay because who in their right mind would choose it. This is a very touchy subject that many don't take lightly. I can't say weather they are born that way or chose that lifestyle, all I can say is, it is not of God.

There was a huge debate going on on V103 in ATL about a minister on Oprah saying "being gay is a gift from God". I don't know how he meant it because I didn't see it, but I don't agree with any way he formed it.

I think homosexuality is a spirit not of God. Doesn't matter if you were born into it or chose it, it is a spirit. The tongue is powerful and we often speak things into existence. The gay community always say they were gay ever since they could remember. They were gay at the age of 5 because they wanted to play with dolls and be the mommy when they played house. Well how come the girls didn't consider themselves gay just because they played football and wrestled with the boys? We call that Tom Boys. Playing with dolls as a little boy doesn't mean you will be or are attracted to them. Society says it means you are gay, so these homophobic parents and community labels that on a child who is doing things differently than the norm. What do you think? Is gay ok? Can you be born that way or choose it?

Thursday, January 1, 2009

2009 started off a GREAT year!

I am so nervous. I can't believe I am finally going to do this. This has been my dream for the last 3 years. The line is getting shorter, and I'm up next. I adjust the mic while looking into the crowd of people. I begin.

"First giving honor to God and pastor. You know the Lord works in mysterious ways. I was just telling my husband that I am coming here expecting something. But never in a million years would I have thought that I would be here, standing in front of all of you. For 3 years I tried to get my story out. I needed to get it out. I needed to spread the word. I wrote emails, blogs and was even told I should write a book. But none of it gave me the satisfaction of being here right now. 3 years ago on my brother's birthday March 6, 2006 I was diagnosed with MS. My fingers and toes were mute. I had no feeling. Some days I couldn't get out of bed. I couldn't make my baby's bottle. But I knew God didn't give me these 3 beautiful babies to not be able to see them or raise them. I was told that I had to take medication or I will be in a wheelchair. For 3 months I injected myself daily with my therapy medication. My spirit wouldn't let me continue it. I had dreams and I had to stop. My faith wasn't strong enough to claim my healing but I said, "the next MRI will not show that lesion" and this time last year it was gone. But you know doctors always downplay God. They told me that that's what lesions do, they come and go. But I knew better. I have been going to this church for 2 yrs and this is the first time I was able to see the pastors face clearly. For the first time I didn't get dropped off at the door, I walked across the parking lot. Pray my strength in the Lord."

The congregation stood to their feet, giving God a much deserved hand and mouth praise. I did it. I accomplished my dream of telling how God worked in my life to 100's. That night was better than any party or club the New Years' has brought before. My eyes were red, throat scratch and head pounding. I had been changed. I left that place 4 hours later meeting a few people that my story touched. I left 4 hours later not the same as I had came. God moved in that place and now the real work begins!

I hope 2009 brings you all peace, happiness, love and prosperity! I love each and every one of you!

Be Blessed,