Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man

Steve Harvey has a new book entitled, " Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man". I have not read the book but I agree with the title. I have always thought like a guy in my relationships. Which in turn had me attracting needy, highly emotional men! Ewwww! I was the type that didn't want to talk to you on the phone after I just spent the whole day with you. Sometimes I wanted to pay for my own meal so that he wouldn't think more of the date than what it really was, a date! I didn't like hearing that I was the "marrying type" or hearing them say they told their mom about me and it had only been 3 months! I think the thing that attracted me to my husband was that he too was a challenge. He didn't drop everything for me at the beginning. He didn't cancel plans for me at the beginning, I didn't meet his mom at the beginning. When we dated, that is what it was, dating. Once we established we are doing more than "going out and having a good time", those other things were fine. I have developed a few questions that I think woman have, but I answered it the way I feel a man would. This is my perspective on how I think they think. Fellas correct me if I'm wrong.

1, How come men don't like to cuddle after sex?
I think some do, but they get hot from the performance and can't take it after the exhaustion. If you are their woman and time is on his side he would cuddle. It's those that are not into you or treat you like a "piece" that's not into cuddling.

2, How soon is too soon to be intimate? So he doesn't see me as slutty.
The first night or within the first week chances are his perception of you will change if it happens within that time frame. Get to know him, waiting long enough to know his character will let him know that you are not his quick fix and it will send the message that you want more.

3, What attracts guys to a woman?
Hygiene and taking care of yourself. Your nails don't have to be long and painted red, just neat and even. Soft nice feet, hands, hair and skin. Just like woman judge men on their shoes, a man also loves a great heel on a woman.

4, What is sexy to a guy?
Sexy is not in what you wear. It is what you exude. You can be sexy with your hair in a ponytail and workout gear on. If a woman knows she's sexy, a man will know it too.

5, What scares off a man?
Clinginess, talks of marriage and hopes for children shared on the first date, flirting with everyone not just him, parties too much.

6, What turns a man off?
Nagging, bad hygiene, a nasty unkept woman (her and her home), slutty dresser, slutty demeanor, wild, and a drunk.

7, Will telling a man what I want scare him off?
Yes, if it is done too soon. But it is needed and appreciated so that you won't waste his time or yours. Once you feel he is interesting enough to want to pursue (usually during the dating/courting phase) ask his short and long term goals. If you don't like where he's headed, cut it off before it goes to far.

8, Why are men afraid/intimidated by an in dependant woman?
I dont feel that all are afraid/intimidated, only those who are not strong and secure with a strong woman or insecure with themselves feel that way. I think every man wants to feel needed. The new age "independent woman'' has now taken over the relationship. It's not the paying of bills, being head strong, or handling business that they don't like. It's the fact that the "independent woman" is wearing the pants in the relationship. She doesn't consult with him before making huge decisions, she doesn't include him or ask his opinion. She also makes it clear that she "don't need him", and that's what they don't like.

Friday, March 20, 2009

Monday, March 2, 2009

25 Random things about ME...Shhhh..don't tell anyone!

1, I was in labor for 1 hr with my first born.

2, Granny had 16 kids.

3, I clubbed 2 hard years and now its out of my system, I hate it.

4, I'm a loner

5, I'm an observer.

6, I don't like to get personal

7, I don't care to make new friends, I'm fine with the ones I have. (is that bad?)

8, I prefer hanging with guys over girls.

9, My first best friend was a boy.

10, I had 2 committed relationships, the others were too smothering.

11, I realized I am spoiled but I was born this way. lol

12, My cousin, sister and I were chased on foot by some men in a van!

13, I found my childhood chicago friend on facebook and now she's in ga too!

14, I love to play pool.

15, I dated my grammar school teacher's son and didnt know it. We were childhood friends.

16, His wife has no clue we dated. (we weren't serious so it's cool I guess)

17, I did some singing in chicago.

18, I dated my cousin's crush and didn't know it.

19, My ga friends and chicago friends knew each other. Small world.

20, I clubbed at E2 right before the E2 night club tragedy. (youtube it!)

21, I'm in the process of getting my first home built, hopefully it all goes well.

22, My husband's cousin and my cousins were friends before we even met. (another small world)

23, I lived in cali and don't plan on going back.

24, I dislike show offs.

25, I hate cooking. Probably because I was forced to do so by a few family members at a young age.

Children and Relationships

, w I have been fortunate and blessed enough to be with the father of my children, however not everyone is so fortunate. At what point do you introduce your mate to your children? Do you wait a certain time limit? 2, 4, 6 months? I personally never had this situation but my personal opinion, why have your children dating your mate? If you do not plan to marry the person why should they have any interaction with your child? I understand that at some point they will meet, but how far should it go? Should they develop a personal relationship only to be left feeling abandoned when the relationship doesn't work out?

When do you introduce your child to your mate?

At what point will you allow them to spend quality time together?