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Bloggin' Momma

I started blogging as a way to clear my head and free my mind. I have always loved to write and have been told that my testimonies were a blessing and an inspiration to others. But the more I wrote for others, the more it became for me.
Every time my thoughts went down on to the keys a weight was lifted. I started realizing it was therapeutic. It got to the point where I would have to get up from bed at 4am to write what was on my mind if I had any intentions on sleeping that night. It is now a necessity. I don't follow a theme or a format. One day it could be about love and the next Hughes net internet.
At one point I even decided to let the world know that I have MS. In the back of my mind I always knew I would share it. I also knew that the whole inspiration for blogging was due to that fearful diagnosis. I knew the only way I could cope with it was to help other people with the same illness. I knew that if one person felt inspired to keep going, I would NEVER stop blogging about it.
God gave me a peace. He spoke to my heart and gave me the words to say. There are a few times that I've blogged and couldn't ever fathom coming up with some of those blogs alone. I look back and I remember the pain of some of the poems. I remember reliving my feelings of insecurities and abandonment. I know that I have evolved because at one point I could not relive some of my writings. It was too raw, too emotional, and too hurtful. Now, I look back and see how I have overcome. I see the difference in every post. I remember being comforted by other blogger moms and feeling I was not alone. Some were only in my life for that one post, to offer their prayers and heart felt thoughts. Others are still around to this day. Regardless of the time frame, they made an impact and for that they will never be forgotten.
So, I guess all in all we all have our reasons for blogging. Some are personal diaries, some are for arts and crafts, or even to chart the growth and development of their children and grandchildren, but for me, it kept me sane. It helped me to relieve my heat and soul of pain and heart ache, while sharing my happiness and good times. Blogging is the journey of my mind.

Y do we club?(E2 night club tragedy below)

I am soooo done with clubbin. Not only because I'm a married woman that has no place there, but because it started to become tiring. Why do we club? To meet someone or jump off, to get drunk, show off our gear, or dance and have a good time? Well I was an innocent clubber..lol. I went to dance and give/get numbers. But I made a conscious decision to stop clubbing. I started to notice that clubbing was a waste of time, figuratively and literally so I started to hit bars. No not to drink but to play darts and pool. Absolutely loved it!! Well there is a reason it was literally a waste of time. Do you know the origin of clubs? Everything has a beginning. Clubs were a form of worship to gods. Witchcraft. The loud drum/bass beat and flashing lights were a ritual of praise and it was meant to steal time. Ever notice after leaving the club it seems like you were only there for a couple of hours but it turned out to be more like 4! My last clubbin experience was 2003 at the popular E2 night club in Chicago. I was there for less than 20mins when my cuz and I noticed it was just toooo packed! Now realizing I was really done now! All the time, money and preparation put into going and only stayed for 20 mins? The money on the outfit that now smelled like smoke, the money for my hair that is now sweated out. Not to mention being ripped off to get in and get something to drink but also disrespected for what I considered the last time by a "club dude". Glad I made the choice when I did because a few weeks later this featured clip is what happened at the very same night club that I frequented monthly! It made national new! In 2003 21 club goers were killed when they were crushed and trapped while trying to flee from the cloud of dust that was left by the pepper spray sprayed into the air. Look at the people who are crushed and trapped in the doorway. Again tell me why you club?
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Devil's Music? (I stay controversial but truthful!)

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Remember being banned from listening to certain music because it is "the devils' music"? Well finally at the ripe age of 28, I get it. From a biblical stand point we all know that Satan was kicked out of Heaven. We also know that he was the chief musician. Well he still is!!!! His powers were never stripped from him. He is still the chief musician. What is his goal? To lure as many people as he can away from Christ. The easiest way is thru music because once it's in you, it can't get out. With TV you can close your eyes, with words you can simply stop reading. But with sound, you cant stop it unless you don't listen in the first place. Think of how music has transformed over time. Some say the enemy tried to lure us thru heavy metal. When playing some songs backward it has hidden messages. One popular message was to smoke weed. Which is why weed was so popular amongst the hippies. However it did not lure us blacks. So now he had to come up with ways to get us. It is said that Bone Thugs-N-Harmony sold their souls to the devil for record sales. On their first CD cover they have witchcraft on it. A message written backward, and the only way to read it is to put it against the mirror. However once this is done you are speaking it into your soul. We know the tongue is powerful. Remember God made the heavens and earth just by speaking it. Did you realize one of Jay-Z mix tape says "murder murder Jesus" backwards? Or that one of Snoops early CD's shows him in the hospital bed dead and coming back to life with Jesus spirit? Or when Wu-Tang had an animation on the beginning of their website that showed the "W" symbol slicing the head off of Jesus and a black hawk sucking out His soul and flying it over and placing it into them? Or the fact that Missy and Snoop have said they make their best music high. Hmm I wonder why? I wonder why their music is sooo much better while high. Because it's not them they are working under. Jay-Z calling himself J-hova. Come on now. And we at the club and concert throwing our hands up to J-hova then turn around on Sunday and throw your hands up to Jesus? Not right. All of this was brought to my attention by a controversial minister name G Craig Lewis. Hip-Hop hates him! He has a 3 or 4 part series entitled "The truth About Hip-Hop". And he speaks to teens all over the world. Check him out and look at this clip. I know many won't like what I have said so feel free to respond.

Please let me know what you thought.

Are You Heaven Bound?

Over the last few years I have lost family and acquaintances, and it has made me think, "If I left today, where would I go?" One scripture that gets me through everything is when God says He would never put more on us than we can bare. To me that means, if I couldn't handle it, He wouldn't have allowed it. So I know that I am strong and it is through Christ who strengthens me.
God is loving and merciful. Every morning that I rise is due to him. Every accident, almost kidnapping, close rapes and molestation attempts were all avoided because of Him. I believe He spared my life so that I had the chance to get it right! Also, so that I would recognize who He is and give Him all the glory. Ten years ago, if my time had ran out, where would I have gone? I would not have been heaven bound. But He continues to spare my life so that I have a chance to do things the way He wants me too. He allowed me to grow so that I can remember to make His will my own. As you live you learn, you grow.
So please remember to thank Him for every thing you do. Even when things aren't going they way you want them to, know that that is His way of protecting you and sparing you. Didn't get the car, man, house, woman, job or money you set out for? Don't worry about it. It was not for you. He closed that door and opened a window. Just turn around and look.
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. So take notice of your life and your blessings. Make everyday count. If you left here today would you be Heaven bound?