Meet Shawn Jackson. I met him on a social networking site and we became fast friends. My hubby and I even had the pleasure to have him accompany us to a business meeting, in which he kindly gave us a copy of his magazine J'Adore!! He is an inspiring, down to earth, humble young man that has learned to play the hand life has dealt him. Even if that hand was a "fold". Check out his magazine and a poem he wrote about being def and having tourette!
WELL SAID MY FRIEND!!
Several parts of me Alone. Many of you know I have Tourette and I'm Deaf. But I never told anyone really how I felt. This is it.
I scream, I hiss, I flail, I miss
I hurt, I maim, and I feel this
A hurt, a twitch, an internal dis
A loss of control, a nuclear near miss
I can't help it, Can't stop it
Can't undo it, can't block it
I can't restrain or refrain it
Can't train my body to contain it
Its built up, can't shut up,
like a faucet that's dripped up
Movements and vocals stay popped up
And through it all, I stand up
Can't stop me, can't contain me
I won't allow it to define me
It doesn't explain the real me
I'm quite sane, here is no insanity
You see the Tourette and think it's me
But is that all there is of me that you see?
Is my yelling indicative of my capacity?
Or is that all you can judge as my quality?
Silence, stillness, yet a static noise
The quiet, the irritation, yet a fake poise
Bearing derision, isolation, yet still making noise
Aloneness, tears welling, yet joking w/ the boys
The hunger for hearing, for understanding, and learning
Yet none stepped forward to hear my yearning
None wanted to learn a new way of communicating
with me, and so I was left wanting and hurting
Alone, quite bare and cold, left needing an ear, a hand
another soul who could understand, with hands,
my words. And the last sounds i heard was in some distant stands
on TV in a crowd gone wild. And here, I thought, alone I stand
Depression took me hard like a terrible earthquake
And to it, there is nothing I can quite equate
to the sadness that enveloped me whole, made my soul deflate
Nothing prepared me for a world of Deafness, a totally new state
I had to move away to find my world, a new world of silent words
it was "Fire" and "water" said with hands, pictures became words
It was first place in my mind, no where near a distant third
Being able to talk without uttering a single word
Months became years, and years piled on and on
yet my wanting, while on hold, had finally won
The road to finally getting my CI was one that was hardspun
on an axis delicately balanced, as if I carried a ton
And now that I can hear, it's not totally a clean sheet
Still with the triumphs and hardships settling beneath
I still struggle, day and out, without using a cheatsheet
Reading lips, saying "pardon?" and "Repeat please?"
My life is my own, and its not been easy
Still not, but life isn't for the queasy.